Let me tell you a story about being in flow and becoming present.
For around a month in my meditations, I started seeing seeing Egyptian imagery. The side profile of an Egyptian God with the head of a specific type of bird. Curiosity compelled me to look it up (Hello, Google!) and found references to the God Thoth.
I knew this was an invitation to work with Thoth but I parked the idea for a little while as I wanted to research him properly before committing to work with an unfamiliar energy.
Then, during some intense Kundalini work, I began seeing a particular long necked bird, similar to a crane, with a long curved beak – an Ibis – I looked up images of the God Thoth and found the cover of The Union of Isis and Thoth by Normandi Ellis and Nicki Scully (Amazon), which showed him exactly as I had seen in my visions!
I decided to buy the book, read a few pages but became preoccupied with other things.
That week I’d been experiencing feelings of overwhelm, made all the more intense because of an intense Kundalini Awakening. I usually enter into a state of meditation to calm myself yet it felt as if I was fighting the edges of my mind. I was observing how I felt, while allowing myself to experience it with the hope of dissolving the anxiety.
We were on our way to a delicious vegan restaurant in Portimao, when the shadow of a huge bird passed over the cobbled streets and as I looked up, it was an Ibis! The bird of my visions. It was impossibly large with a huge wing-span, a long neck and elegantly curved beak.
In that moment I felt a deep connection with Thoth and felt honoured that he was making his presence known to me. I kept the book in mind as we walked.
We eventually found the restaurant and sat on the roof terrace, overlooking the old buildings below.
Until I began experiencing overwhelm and anxiety crept in. I was still practicing Compassionate Observation without engaging in the anxiety, while fluidly allowing myself to experience it, yet the overwhelm felt like a cloud of frantic mental energy around the top of my head that threatened to shut my brain down.
Kundalini, being pure source consciousness, is particularly sensitive to the things we deem normal in the ‘human world’ – like too much sugar, any form of alcohol… Or fear!
Fear and Kundalini can’t co-exist and I’ve been experiencing what I can only call ‘purging’ (or energetic vomitting), where my body forcefully and involuntarily expels energies or emotions that aren’t in alignment with my ascension.
I’ve begun to see this as a normal process which clears lower formed energies from the energy field very effectively. Sometimes this lasts for an hour or more and is followed by profoundly deep states of inner peace and altered states of consciousness.
So, at the top of this beautiful restaurant in Portimao, my Kundalini began purging the fear from my root chakra and mouth!
Luckily the restaurant was empty and I laughed at the thought of someone filming me from an adjacent building and uploading it to Youtube.
After I’d cleared the overwhelm and continued being the Compassionate Witness, I felt compelled to pick up the book about the Goddess Isis and the God Thoth.
A page in and I read a passage that changed everything.
“Every moment is a new beginning and no moment is ever repeated the same way”
…Every moment is a new beginning…
In that moment I suddenly realised something of Great Importance.
Seemingly so simple yet it seamlessly connected the dots.
I’ve always been a lucid dreamer and after mastering flying, the next mission I gave myself was to learn teleportation – to faraway lands like sunny beaches with rolling blue oceans.
This task was met frustration for years as I’d force myself to concentrate on conjuring up the place I wanted to go, which would appear for a few moments only to dissolve into where I didn’t want to be.
It was impossible because my attention was split between two locations.
Years later I finally learned how to do it… And instantly.
I opened my mind to the location I wanted to be and simultaneously dropped all memory of where I was standing and emerged into that location, simply by entering into an inner state of stillness.
A delicate shift in perception
“Every moment is a new beginning”
I tell you this because I want to illustrate the importance of attention and the delicate shift in consciousness needed to achieve optimal states of perception.
When I read “Every moment is a new beginning” it made perfect, poignant sense. Each moment seamlessly rolls into the next, emerging from your attention.
Imagine your attention as a moving ball of energy which gains momentum and power the softer your focus on observing each new moment – excitement and wonder naturally emerge. The moment your old story crops up, it casts a net around the rolling ball of energy and distorts its path, pulling it off course and stopping your awareness from building in power.
Earlier that day when I was witnessing my feelings I was still holding onto them, despite attempting to be fluid and present. I was witnessing but not allowing the new moment to fully emerge, in the same way my attention was split in my dreams.
Holding onto your old story prevents fluid consciousness
It was the thing I most needed to understand at that moment – And Thoth guided me to it.
When you realise that each moment is in fact a new beginning, the old moment falls away and you become perfectly fluid. Intense feelings of peace and unconditional love flows from each new moment. Each new beginning.
Life is presenting herself to us all the time, but we deny ourselves the wonder and excitement of each new moment because we hang onto the last.
My ‘old moments’ were the looming threat of anxiety and overwhelm. But I realised in that moment, that true power comes from zero attachment, including zero attachment to emotional states, blissful or otherwise.
Your perception is your greatest teacher
Your perception is a reflection of your inner world and by observing how and why you perceive something, there’s huge potential for growth and personal power.
You’re exactly where you need to be to learn exactly what you need to learn – you need only enter the flow of life and listen.
“Each moment is a new beginning”
Surrendering into the present moment is like lying backwards in the ocean and trusting the waves to keep you afloat.
Call your energy back to you, from all of the things hanging over your head, from all of your worries, from all of the conversations you wish had gone better, from the betrayals and heartbreaks. You call your energy back to you and softly bring your attention to each emerging moment, allowing each new beginning to carry you towards freedom.
Buddha had it right. Attachment is suffering.
If attachment is where we fixate our energy and fixation creates suffering, therefore Fluidity is Freedom.
We arrive at the moment we’re supposed to arrive at and in perfect harmony, because we’ve dropped all resistance.
When you’re in flow, life dances from one beautiful synchronicity to the next, like the appearance of the Ibis and Thoth in my visions, to seeing its huge shadow pass before me and looking up to seeing the same bird, which lead me to the passage in the book and a monumental shift in my perception.
Magic is everywhere!
When we’re detached from an outcome, we arrive fluidly, wholly and in our full power.
Detachment is not that you own nothing, but that nothing owns you
Attachment and resistance can be seen as the same thing and both disrupt the flow of energy. Resistance comes from not trusting the flow of life – to wanting to hold onto what is safe.
Where your energy is fixated, it diminishes the total power of the whole. For example, somebody says something hurtful to you and you spend your day and evening thinking about all of the things you wish you’d said. Or, you’re in a stressful work environment, and you can’t switch off even at home with your family. Or you’re embroiled in family drama with the constant back and forth… All create constriction.
Somebody doesn’t have to be active in your life to be active in your inner world
If you imagine your personal power to be like a glass of water and every time you feel stuck in the past or worry about your future, you spill a little of the water outside of the glass. You have less water in your glass and less personal power at your disposal – your energy is scattered.
We lose power when parts of our being have split off and are languishing in the past. For example, a traumatic situation may have caused a part of your soul to split off and that part of your soul is trapped within that event – in Psychology this is called the Splitting of the Psyche – sub-personalities become repressed within your unconscious. The emergence of these sub-personalities is unfamiliar territory and Shadow Work, Inner Child Work and Soul Retrieval can bring those lost parts back, into the whole.
More simply, we lose power when our mind is focused on anything but the Now – The ever eternal moment.
Personal power is your inner reservoir of strength born from self-love – you know your value.
Personal Power is not allowing external events or people to influence your feelings and actions, standing within your boundaries as a sovereign being.
Personal Power is your capacity to create a life that emerges from love rather than fear. Magic is desire and intent made manifest.
Personal Power is your ‘spiritual power’ – throughout the process of your spiritual journey in becoming whole again you have more ‘energy’ to open your spiritual gifts and abilities.
Personal Power is the force of your intent.
A measure of your Personal Power is the success of your intent.
Call your power back to you. Become fluid.
- Close your eyes
- Place your bodily awareness into your central channel. It runs from your groin to your crown
- Pool your awareness into the area above your Solar Plexus Chakra, where your lower rib cage meets and call your energy back to you.
- Collect yourself from all your thoughts or worries and simply breath smoothly but firmly, into your Solar Plexus
- Softly engage with each new moment as it appears, from the single, fluid point of balance within your Solar Plexus
- Breathe, feel each new beginning, emerge into each new moment
- Rather than Witnessing the Self, Witness the Present Moment – as if it were an ocean you swim through – Then, the Self falls away.
This subtle shift may take some practice but you’ll be able to feel your consciousness inside your body.
I’ve found that the direction of consciousness shifts depending on your effort. Too much concentration puts you into Active Masculine – too little and you’re in Passive Feminine. Aim for the perfect balance.
As we emerge into each new moment, we are free. Whole. Everything yet nothing all at the same time.
Hold with open palms
Don’t chase states of being – like blissful states of full body ecstasy during meditation. By reaching out with our energy, by wanting, we’re not whole. It only creates attachment and distortion within the flow of energy.
Those states of bliss will naturally emerge from nothing.
The delicate balance of the masculine and feminine principles that transcend duality into unity.
In moments of emerging perfection, when you roll seamlessly into the next, all judgement is suspended. Your story falls away. You become your most authentic self and are able to give yourself fully to another.
True moments of connection emerge.
You become your true God self.